Burdened with Glorious Purpose

Sorry for the late post… again!

And you know, I really don’t even have an excuse. I’m not in classes right now (they start Monday, meep!) and I’m only working 20 hours a week. My new awesome roomie is moved in and we’ve settled in pretty well. So I can’t even come up with an excuse for why I didn’t post yesterday… other than that I got lazy

Apparently having a lot more free time than I’m use to brings out a terrible laziness in me. I’ve barely written anything, I’m dragging on my edits and I am spending the vast majority of my time either watching movies or goofing off on the internet (Tumblr has stolen my soul…)

And it drives me crazy that I am being so unproductive and then I panic and stay up late, thinking, ‘Just one more tumblr page and then I’ll write..’ or ‘Just one more episode of Deadliest Women’ and then I’ll really get to work… It’s a terrible viscous cycle.

I was productive in other ways yesterday; I organized my bookshelves and cleaned up my desk. I decided on a new system to help me organize my writing thoughts (just need to get a cork board/white board and I am set!) and I even did laundry, but when it came to putting butt in chair and hands on keyboard to be productive… It just flew out the window.

I’ve been doing so well for such a good chunk of time, but apparently if I lack structure I just go all limp-brained and don’t want to work anymore. Bad, bad, bad, bad self.

So while cleaning up yesterday I pulled back out my tea-pot timer and added a new note to the wall in front of my desk.

Write like its your job, and one day it will be.

Now, I’m not saying that this is going to be an insta-fix for the lazy that has come over me, but seeing that note every day at my desk is going to remind me why I’m doing this instead of goofing off on the internet or napping the day away. Because I have a goal, a dream and I’ll be damned if I don’t reach it.

I’ve pulled out an old idea for a rather massive story, told in a way that I’ve never done before. I don’t know if I’m going to succeed or fall flat on my face but if there is one thing I’ve learned over the years it’s that some things can only be learned by having your face slammed into the mud and held under for a few seconds. Some lessons take that pain of failure to really make their point.

I’m taking the right steps, chatting with a few people about this project and remembering that I have a helluva lot of potential and if I’m going to ever meet it then I’m going to have to get off of my ass, out of my comfort zone and eat some dirt.

One of the main reasons that internet has eaten me lately… but still… If Loki can be burdened with glorious purpose, than so can I!!

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1 Comment »

  1. Jeroen Steenbeeke Said:

    Perhaps your desk isn’t the ideal place to do writing then? I know I’m a lot less productive behind my PC than when I’m using my Netbook (despite the fact that the Netbook makes typing a bit harder). We writers can be quite quirky about where and how we write, so perhaps you haven’t found the perfect spot yet?


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