The Silent Sneakiness of Stress

I think to some extent stress is good. It keeps you moving, motivate, etc. But sometimes stress sneaks up on you. It’s a lot like how a frog will be boiled alive if you turn the water up bit by bit (is that a myth?). The frog doesn’t realize it’s in boiling water being made into frog soup until it’s too late.

That’s what stress is like for me. I think everything is going fine, not too stressed and then WAGH WHY IS THE WATER BOILING AR98GHAR0HG8ARGAGBREGBAER

Exactly like that.

AGHHH IT BURNS! WHY??

That is where I am. I just noticed the water is boiling.  It’s nothing horrible. It’s all things that will pass and I know it. But, that doesn’t help when you’re IN boiling water. The burns will heal but it still hurts like hell (am I stretching this boiling water thing too far? Yes? I thought so)

It’s strange that my body and subconscious realized how stressed I was months ago. They saw the water getting hotter and hotter, and tried to warn me. I’ve had chronic shoulder and neck knots for weeks. The doctor asked if it could be stressed related and I told him no way. Well played shoulders. Well played.

But I know where you live shoulders...

My writing has also become more frantic, disjointed and violent over the past month. Without even realizing it I’ve been writing about racing hearts, bodies bursting, hospitals, and things coming a part at the seams. Looking at it now, it’s so obvious how stressed and freaked out I am right now.

Long story short a loved one has been very ill on and off for almost 3 years, and is now going to a speciality hospital for treatment/diagnosis. So I am taking care of my younger sibling by myself and trying to hold down the fort of the house.

It’s no pity party, and I know things will be fine, but I was really surprised to see how much my unconscious mind realized before me. It takes me having to hide in the bathroom in tears at work when someone asks how 2011 is going to realize there is a problem.

Nope, nothing wrong here.

 I remain oblivious even though my body and subconscious are hitting me with sledgehammers and electroshocks to try to wake me up. Silly brain. Well, now I know I’m stressed/scared/paniced/sad/anxious/human and I’m going to try to cope with it as well as I can. Deep breaths, meditation, write. Side projects are going to have to take a back burner for me to just get along for now.

Has your writing ever really made you realize something before or helped you cope with some extreme emotion?

Also, I apologize if posts for the next few weeks are weak. ❤

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6 Comments »

  1. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Judy Black and Draven Ames. Draven Ames said: RT @judyblackcloud: The Silent Sneakiness of Stress: http://wp.me/p1bGYd-4Q […]

  2. Colum Said:

    Stay strong, Judy.

    You’re obviously doing something right, if the fates have chosen to smite thee. 🙂

    Get yourself someone to rub those shoulders, and jump on out of the pot. You’ll be fine.

    🙂

    • Judy Black Said:

      Aw, yeah. I have a bit of a black cloud for luck (hence Judyblackcloud) The pot is slowly turning it’s temperature back down I think. it’s snowing today after all!

  3. randallweiss Said:

    Writing does usually make me aware of hidden feelings/emotions. Unfortunately one of my responses to stress tends to be a reduction in writing. After a few weeks of not writing much, I’ll open my notebook and wonder why so many pages are blank. “Huh. I guess I’ve been stressed…”

    You are a strong person, so I’m sure you’ll make it through this season with more ease and grace than you can currently imagine. Just don’t forget to take care of yourself with intentional rest and relaxation.

    • Judy Black Said:

      Aw thank you. It has been a real struggle to keep everything together the past few weeks, and this week shall be the big test, but I know it’ll pass and that I have excellent friends to help me out and encourage me (like you!!)

  4. randallweiss Said:

    If you need an outlet to vent, don’t hesitate to email or call.


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